An Autodidactics Experience With Home Education

This article is my ramblings regarding the concept that children will learn what they need to, when they need to, in the way that best suits their individual needs. I am trying to resolve this conflict in my mind between my opinion on this and a close friends opinion whose wisdom and opinion I value and respect. I must continue to reevaluate my thoughts and goals for this non-traditional school I hope to be a part of so I do not create a situation that could damage young people.


My personal experience with my own children and long time friends is that children will continue to learn and progress in their "grade level expectations" and every other area of their lives without being forced to do work out of a text book or by being forced to read boring books that do not relate to their lives or interests. In fact my experience is that if you leave a child (or any person) to live his life in the context of a nurturing family that also continues their own "natural, life long" learning that child will exceed your expectations (including traditional school expectations)

I have had several discussions with a friend who believes that this concept is faulty in certain circumstances. She has witnessed my children who are obviously intelligent, happy and well adjusted. If you did not intimately know our family you would assume my children attended school and spent a lot of time with their noses in books and doing lots of homework. The reality is that we spend as little time as possible in "formal studies". We spend as much time as we can pursuing our individual interests. We learn and experience things we enjoy. We do "school" because we have to, because their father insists that they have a traditional "school book" education, even though our experiences have proven that is unnecessary. We have joint custody of the children, which means that we share decision making regarding education and health issues. We spend a lot of time doing things that feel like we are just hanging out. We spend a lot of time PLAYING. The reality is that while we play we are actually learning more and faster than while we are "studying". Since we play a lot and do things we love we are learning...all the time! Even when it appears we are not learning.

Anyhow, she believes that the parent must have the ability to "impart wisdom" and has pointed out that as an autodidact I, without realizing, "impart wisdom" regularly, just like eating and breathing. She believes that my children are as intelligent as they are because I set an example of continuing to learn about and try new things.

She believes, through her personal observations, that a parent cannot pass on something they do not possess. A parent must have wisdom to impart it, they must set an example for a child to live a life of an autodidact. (I am not speaking of intelligence, but wisdom and knowledge)

She believes that under these circumstances the parent may do better to use textbooks and various tools to assist in the learning process. that the parent cannot give what he/she does not have. She feels that if the parent does not have the skills or desire to be a self learner they will not be able to pass that on to his/her child.

I have been tossing this idea about in my mind for months now. I have been observing every family I encounter to learn if this hypothesis is accurate. Through my observations I have learned that children pick up family speech patterns and vocabulary, world view, perception of learning ability, play and learning habits. I have learned that families that value traditional education over play often have children loose their ability to play creatively or play without feeling that they should "grow up and get on with things". Families who value mainly success in a traditional learning style and whose children does not jive with text book learning often feel that they are inadequate or not smart and verbalize this often, which is tragic because these children are incredibly intelligent.

These observations have given some truth in my mind to her opinion. Now I have more questions. What effect does that sort of environment have on a child? Is the child simply under stimulated? I still believe that a child is born to learn, explore and master his environment, so has he been taught by example to stop (or maybe minimize) his exploration of his world? Will this child thrive in an environment which allows freedom of thought, play and learning or will he fall stagnant due to lack of example?

If her observations are true, this type of non-traditional school will be of great benefit for those families. This child will be engaged in conversations and activities with people of all ages, intelligences and backgrounds. He will, without realizing, expand his knowledge and learn how to play again, after all, playing is the best way to learn.